1st of October I had a hip replacement operation; it came at a surprise as I’ve always thought it was only because I didn’t stretch enough that I had a pain - but returning from India in February '24, I realized it had to be something else. The orthopedic surgeon in whose practice I initially went didn’t do a very good job - and he seemed annoyed even more that I knew what the muscles, joints and ligaments were called, and his famous last words were: “You have to stretch more!” before leaving in a huff!
I found someone else and when I met him my gut said “YES! Him I can trust!”, and he took his time to explain and plan everything so I was happy!
Now, Im not a huge fan of operations, there are so many things that can go wrong that you can’t prepare for; and even if preparation was possible, there would be the huge unknown factor that could throw a big spanner in the works and let all plans shatter. On top of that - you cut into your body! You sever skin, tissue, ligaments, muscle and then you rummage around to make things better with risking everything ….. and here I haven’t even mentioned the subtle energy lines in your body that will also sever and not be as efficient, because around a scar the energy will harden up and you will most probably have problem area there if you dont take it seriously and work with it post-op.
…. so, no. Not a fan!
Going into the operation I didn’t think much of it - but the morning where I saw the lines of light running from top of my head to my feet, being transported from my room to the operation theatre - suddenly I became nervous, heart starting to thump, sweating and short breathed.
I only there - on the table, literally before the first incision, realized…… “… if this goes wrong, I will never be able to work again!”, and then I fell asleep.
I woke up immediately - because that’s what it feels like - with sounds and lights and voices everywhere. I couldn’t distinguish if they were for me to hear. Before I knew it I had a brand sparkling new piece of kit that requires a separate passport - and in the process lost all power in my body.
Now, I’m a loner when I heal; I find a cave, crawl inside and sleep until I cannot sleep anymore - then I check how everything is, eat and drink, and routine is repeated if necessary. It works for me, but is difficult in a hospital environment today; check ups, medicines, toilets, bandages…… and often in a shared room. Sometimes you’re lucky to end up with a loner that will just crawl in beside you, recover, sleep, eat, repeat…… and sometimes not!
On my first day I was on my legs, that’s normal - you have to check that everything is ok, your sensations are there, you dont have pain and that you don’t feel bad….. I did more…. I had to go to the toilet, so 2 nurses found me a toilet chair and took me to the toilet while I did my business - I heard their whispers about “that this Viking didn’t have too much pain to consider staying in bed”…. and it was painful, of course! I almost crushed the upper arm of the nurse who said “Just hold on here”, when I got back into bed and after that, the deal was they needed help from some men I couldn’t crush with shear pain-power in a grip!
The next days just went in a daze, doctors checking and asking about pain, the reoccurring question of “When where at the toilet last time?” Very soon - maybe already the first day - I realized the pain from my hip had gone! The pinching feeling over the front of my body, my loins, the adductor head on the front of leg all the way down to my knee, the piriformis (the “pain in the a*** muscle” as I call it) and best of all….. I didn’t feel the inside of my hip as a painful spot; I felt it as a spot where there had been done a lot of work so it was sore - and how magnificent was that! I had enough power to go to the toilet, have a bit of a walk, little physiological workouts to make sure range and balance were ok. And then back to bed and more sleeping in the cave!
In Germany after this kind of operation you are allocated into a rehabilitation facility to make sure you’re working with the muscles involved and you don’t ruin what they’ve put in and have to come back and have it done again!Almost as if it’s an investment the country does to make sure that you are now fit and happy and can stay out of hospital.
The idea is great; 3-4 weeks in a facility where you’re with others in the same situation as you, therapies around the clock, help with diets and filling out paperwork (if needed), so you’re ready for your natural habitat, having an array of exercises, ideas, pain management….. so you can “get on with it” and find a new way with a new body!
A lot of it is working! Many talented, gifted doctors and specialists who ONLY work with this area of knowledge. Different and interesting therapies to know of so you also can choose something that works for you when you get home. A group of likeminded to choose from if you need someone to talk to.
But it also feels like a way to make money; there are SO MANY people in the facilities, that you often feel like a number to them when the physiological asks you for the third time “….. and hip, right??” Or when you’re waiting on a line of chairs outside the voltage therapy and when theres a room free, the next is going in. Like test animals. Often the therapists don’t have the time to explain, or again they forget what you’re there for and you stop asking! The quality must somewhere get lost…. and for me the worst is in the food!
I moved to Germany in ’13 and I love living there! I mean - a country made of Beer & Meat!! What’s not to like!!! I like to go down to the Metzger and ask for a nice piece of good matured meat and then cook, serve and enjoy that with my husband - with a Weizenbier or a Karlsberg.
But right now I don’t feel like meat and Knödl - I feel like lighter food, I know my body heals better on a lighter diet, loads of fresh vegetables and and delicious fruits helping my constipation…… it has been difficult!
In Denmark where I’m from there is another view on food in hospitals; the one of food as a healer. When you’re in hospital you can choose between many different options, vegan, vegetarian, gluten-free - so that you have food that you can eat, because when you’re going through a big operation, you’ll need the strength from food to give your body the best possibilities to heal! It’s nothing fancy, oh no, but you have options! And I think that the way the culture is carried through eating habits does mean something to the standard of health, not only in Germany but probably all over the world.
For me it meant when I told the hospital I was vegetarian, couldn’t eat bread because I was allergic to gluten, and that I didn’t like cheese - they were stumped! Basically I only had one meal a day that I could eat, not that that’s a problem….. but in a healing process, you need to be firing on all cylinders!! And of course I had a problem with going to the toilet - slowly poisoning yourself from the inside is not great when you’re recovering and being filled with all kinds of medicaments. So I asked if i could have some prunes. Or dates. Or just some salad. Well, salads were 2 days a week, an apple or a banana for breakfast or lunch, and then I opted for the vegetarian course which I must say was very delicious. But else, no - nothing like that, but I could get some tablets!!?? Honestly….. I don’t need anymore tablets right now!! I’ve got enough!
I went into rehabilitation facility hoping that it would be different there…. alas, not! The same white buns or Roggen, same 2 kinds of cheese, same 2 kinds of traditional meats (and I don’t that either, remember) for every breakfast and dinner, and then the lunches - with a veggie option - are different, maybe also in rotation?
Unfortunately, I lost my will to live coming here - I found out I need to feel loved in my food! Fresh, colorful, delicious, tasty and not cooked to death. To start my day with a cooked oatmeal with raisins and nuts and honey. To hear the crunch of carrots and white cabbage and enjoy the feeling of “sinking your teeth into something”. Not to go somewhere where my teeth are on a holiday (quote: Big Bang Theory)
I know I have to eat well to feel well! “You are what you eat”. I think the system could maybe look into using the food as a healer instead of a “downer”. Processed food takes energy from the body - and fresh food gives it energy! And surely, especially when were recovering for illnesses or chronic diseases or operations we need to use energy to heal. And why not use the food to reinforce the power of healing!?
It's now March and I'm post OP +5. I have been working hard with my therapists here in my village and I am more than happy now; it MEANS something when you're like by the people treating you, when you're more than a number. My healing has gone better after returning home to good, colourful food, veggies and good beer. And to sleep in your own bed, what a bliss!!
I still worry - my hip went out of joint 2 weeks after he operation and I felt a pain I've never felt before! My brain is still holding on to that fear.... it's the most difficut muscle to work with, the brain - you can't control it.....
So I'm working with love and attention - and I don't see the progress myself in the way others do; last week one of my yogis came and said "I'm surprised as to how much better you move!!" - and I realised YES!! I move better. I feel better!
I'm now into my daily life again - and it has been such a bliss to have my yoga classes to look forward to. I've missed my people, my conversations, the laughs and the work. I'm so lucky that I have this job where I can move back into my own strength, a job where I have to be mindful and kind towards myself.
I am hopeful again that I will eventually be back to my old self!
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